So, the track is definitely not a place for people who suffer from the fractum collum, (Latin for broken neck) syndrome.
They are my worst nightmare: broken neck syndrome sufferers. Yet, as a true outdoor freak and all-around sports lover who goes to work on his bike, I come across them every day.
I'm telling you, they are even worse than the people who -- and this might sound crazy because it's illegal -- talk on the phone or text while driving. You know those who shamelessly take advantage of every straight bit of road to pick their phone up again… I cannot believe how many of them are out there, dangerously sharing the highways with me.
Back to the broken neck syndrome, a true and serious medical condition that affects many, many people.
Wondering what it is? Well, those who suffer from broken neck syndrome can only turn their head one way, hence the "broken neck" name.
Fortunately for them, on our city's roads, danger always comes from one side only. Whether it's the mom pushing her stroller around or the pedestrian or the cyclist or the cute girl in the tight jogging pants, they all come from the left. ALWAYS. Nothing ever comes from the right side.
Nothing? Well, except maybe for… all of the above.
Of course, danger never comes from the same side! It wouldn't be called danger if it wasn't unexpected. Still, every day I see people not seeing me as I try to cross square junctions. I see people brushing past me as if I was an Armco barrier at the Monaco Grand Prix track. And not just kids who are learning to drive, seasoned commuters, too.
Actually, the Armco barrier metaphor doesn't work because people who drive race tracks know where they are going. They are not effected by fractum collum, as I said earlier.
Luckily, if you do suffer from broken neck syndrome, there are treatments available to you. They're called "take your time, look right and left" and "breathe when you drive," and you don't even need medical insurance. How awesome is that?